Ok, so first thing first—I apologise that this blog is the first one that I’ve written in months! You’d be glad to know that I’ve just been forced out of that procrastinative/ too-busy-to-breathe-and-write rot, by none other than my social conscience…
I just viewed the video “Someone please call this girl’s parents” of the unsupervised 12-year-old-looking local girl (—newly budding in physique, like if she just hit puberty). The 10 minute video goes on to showcase her highly provocative dirty-dancing performance while she baby-sits a very young female toddler. In the performance, the child wines, dutty wines, booty shakes, pulls up her skirt revealing her high-cut-underwear-looking-shorts, pulls up her top to reveal her bra, wines on the baby, and subsequently, the baby follows her. To add to the traumatising disturbing-ness, I think the clip was originally posted by an older, grimey looking, thirsty-looking adult man…
To say the least—it was horrendous and heartbreaking>>> and in a feeble attempt to protect the young lady’s identity (mind you, this thing has gone viral already), I refuse to share the link to the video since the two children’s faces are in plain view and the clip looks like soft porn…As another parent astutely observed—“paedophiles r gonna have a field day with this 1.”
Now granted you may have already seen the clip, or are just satisfied with my account of it, let’s break down the scary issues in question form:
1) Where the living lollipop is the adult supervision? These babies were clearly left at home alone and seemed very accustomed to it—it brings me back to my previous article “Absentee parents- raising adult babies”–take a read here on frizzlefowl if you haven’t yet.
2) Why is such a young girl (who needs to be off doing her homework or something related) babysitting a toddler? And clearly in the video the toddler was mimicking her elder’s behaviour which sadly brings us back to the “vicious-cycle” phenomenon…
3) Where on earth did this young child learn all those, errr for lack of a better word- slutty- moves? This young girl knows how to move…and when I say “move”, I mean in a highly sexual way…it brings to mind the question, what exactly has she been exposed to? And by whom? Her parents/guardians? Her peers? Media? Interrelatedly many folks in the comment thread understandably speculated that the young girl could have been the toddler child’s mother, and that she seemed to be already very sexually involved.
4) Has this behaviour been previously noticed? Has it been condoned or condemned by her parents/ guardians? What disciplinary actions, if any, have been taken? I sometimes mourn the loss of the ole-time hard hand (pun intended)///
5) For whom did she create this clip—who was meant to be the audience? How did the grimey looking fella get this video? Did she post it herself or was it someone else? And how does this child feel about it being posted on the world wide web, accessible to multi-millions of people? Was it a violation of her rights? Or was it consensual? Is it shameful in her perception, or viewed as a glamorous ‘bad-gyul’ thing?
6) What is being done to protect her identity? Why are so many seemingly level-headed folks sharing it, therefore adding to the sensationalism? Is it going to be removed from the internet? Do any child protection policies come into play here? Where are the necessary litigations and actions by our local authorities?
In the end all, this disturbing thing, this very disturbing thing, has me once again questioning our effectiveness as parents. Have we really been our neighbours’ keeper- wholeheartedly subscribing to that upstanding belief of our forefathers that it takes a village to raise a child? This video draws to the forefront, how very dysfunctional we can be as a society, and how laxly we treat these issues as we often remain nonchalant about the important things like youth media reform, social services and supervision, awareness of legislation re. internet broadcasting and children rights, internet protocol, secondary school laptop distribution and policing procedures, disciplinary measures in sensitive situations…the list goes on.
We need to bombard our forums, both physical and virtual, with the propagation of good societal values and protocol. We need to adopt the philosophy that we are responsible for everything around us, and make some serious movements to bring about change in some small and collectively vast way.
I will end on a positive note by referring to outstanding work of the youthful 2 Cents Movement. https://www.facebook.com/The2CentsMovement?fref=ts I was first exposed to them at the RBCs Young Leaders’ Make a Change 2013 Awards Ceremony. My students and I were mesmerised and inspired by the account of Boysie/Boyo (I think) and his big head, who after getting a revelation from the Almighty, decided that he will make a change in his minuscule way (even if he was “a spec, on a spec, on a spec”) because he just could; . Roping it further in, there was this riveting, truthful, video piece that was posted up this week entitled ” Maxi man tracking school gyul ”
It delved into the realities of the day; these warped mentalities that prevail. I see it all around me—in school, on the streets, in my neighbours’ homes> and I urge you, as this vibrant, conscious group has been doing; we too must fall into the bracket of social activism for awareness and positive change.
To all my fellow biological/ surrogate parents out there—we need you. You remain at the helm of the family unit, the basis of our social structure. You mould the minds entrusted to you, and it your responsibility to do it diligently. Your actions are mimicked, and your attitudes reflected. it is important to adopt a wholesome parenting strategy, and manage it with a firm but loving hand. Keep your girl and boy chirren close to you; protect them and teach them to protect themselves…